Seeking Truth

I typically pride myself as a good storyteller - but not today. The emotions are high, the situation is grand, and my writing abilities are poor after little sleep over the past few weeks. 

This is our story. At least an introduction to it. It's a sad story, but I pray that it can be a testimony of the Lord's healing and redemption. God is good. ALL the time. This is our test of faith. 

It all began three years ago. We were soon-to-be newlyweds, SO excited to be joining the Lord in ministry. Both of us had a history of our families being hurt by churches, so our desire was to always be sure that conflict was resolved immediately. We poured our hearts out to our pre-marital counselor, sharing with him our past, and asking for advice on how to be sure we didn't let the same thing happen to us.  

Unfortunately, despite our efforts, our young family can now say we've been burned by a church. We were met by opposition by leadership at the very first meeting we ever held at the church, and that opposition only continued over the last three years.  We keep trying to remind ourselves that the actions of a few people who are not seeking the Lord is not the work of the Lord, or the church body as a whole, but it doesn't lessen the hurt. 

Today's post is not one for details, though those will follow soon. Today's post is to share our hearts briefly with those we won't have a chance to say goodbye to. 

We were blindsided. Tyler received a call this week that he was required to be at an emergency elders meeting. At this meeting he was torn down, for anything and everything they could think of that he has done wrong over the last three years. Of course, these things were never brought to his attention, nevertheless, he is being held accountable for them (remind me to tell you about the donut table.) 

He was told by elders of the church that he is unapproachable, and is not a leader. Of course, he is the only person in the church who leads an entire team of people on a weekly basis, as well as a small group. Tyler shared his heart to seek reconciliation and biblical accountability, but he was told by leaders that there was no point in seeking reconciliation. 

I must catch myself. I promised this wouldn't be the full story, but I can't help to share some details. One of my great flaws as a storyteller is giving too much detail! 

The end of the large picture of the story is this - Tyler was called yesterday by an elder of the church and told that they had chosen to part ways with us. No explanation. No reasons. Tyler was told that we would not receive a severance, and we would be escorted to the church to pick up our things. 

With what we have experienced so far, I'm afraid the story will be skewed to paint Tyler and me in a poor light, and there is nothing we can do about that but pray for the hearts of the people who have knowingly and purposefully hurt us. Our hearts are breaking because of how we have been treated, but also because we are concerned as to how the church body will be affected by this. We have poured our hearts into the people of Bethany over the last three years, and we hate to see them hurt because of thoughtless actions. 

Our desire is not to hurt Bethany with our words of Truth. Our desire is to see the church grow, however, we could never hope to see another family placed under the spiritual oppression that we were subject to.  Our hearts are breaking because it was made clear that we are never wanted back.  We will never have a chance to say goodbye to our church family, and this saddens us greatly. 

In closing, I cannot write this post without sharing just how blessed we are. We are blessed with family who is willing to stand up for us and hold people to biblical accountability.  We are blessed with the best small group, full of godly young people who have prayed over us, cried with us, and pushed us to be Jesus, even when that was the very last thing we wanted to do.  We are blessed with friends who are like family, and would go to the ends of the earth to make sure we are cared for. Thank you for being a true example to us and to Rosie of what it means to be the body of Christ. We are eternally grateful for you. 

 

If you've read this far, you must truly care about the Pavey family, and I would ask that you keep us in your prayers as Tyler begins the search for a new job.  With a 7 month old, and no severance, the pressure is on for us to find something quickly. However, we want to seek the Lord and serve in a position where He wants us to serve, whether that is in ministry or not.  Please pray for our hearts, that we will not allow anger and bitterness to take root. 

Please also be praying for Bethany Christian Church. Pray that their leadership would seek the Lord. 

And if you're interested, stay tuned for more details. We believe that the Lord desires for truth to be spoken. We spoke truth at Bethany, which ruffled feathers - but we won't allow that to keep us from speaking truth in the future.